humanresource | I'd rather be spitting blood than have this silence fuck me up [Neil]

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I'd rather be spitting blood than have this silence fuck me up [Neil]

The new year had passed and then the first week of it and, just like that, Edgar had been in Darrow a year. He hadn't had much time to dwell on it, what with birds trying to peck the shit out of his hand, but when things got quiet he'd had the time to sit and think on it. One year had passed, one year that he shouldn't have gotten.

He'd felt like a fucking god when he realized. There he was, nothing but a Tail Section hick and he'd practically cheated death. Fucking brilliant.

Then the snow had started falling and Edgar's gut had twisted up nervously. He'd come in with a snow storm and maybe that was the thing that'd take him away too.

Sitting in his apartment, Edgar stared out at the snow falling, a hot cup of coffee in his hands. His shoulders were tense as he kept vigil, determined not to be taken by surprise. He liked Darrow. He didn't want to leave.

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"Sounds stupid," Edgar said. He'd recovered enough of himself to be purposefully difficult and smirked at Neil. It sounded as stupid as the songs sounded dreadful.

"Free vacation? Lucky bastards. Back in my day..."

He snorted, too caught up in the irony to even finish the joke.

"Yeah, everything was fucking horrible. I've heard all about it," I said, pinching his hip with a snort of laughter.

"Snow was supposed to be romantic. It gave a bunch of sexually repressed, hetero assholes an excuse to stay inside and grope at each other to keep warm."

Edgar snorted and reached out to nudge at Neil's side with a closed fist. It was an approximation of a punch with none of the violence.

"That sounds like their own goddamn problem, not mine," Edgar said, unimpressed.

Snorting out a laugh, I shoved him off of my lap, throwing my weight forward to pin him down on the cushions.

"Who said it was your problem? You asked what the big deal was about snow, I answered," I pointed out, digging my knuckles into his ribs, checking for ticklish spots.

"I didn't say it was my problem!" Edgar protested. He sucked in a breath and tried to arc out of the way when Neil's fingers brushed a sensitive spot. Not that he could really flatter himself; Edgar knew he'd given himself away when he bit his lip and breathed a bit sharp.

"Oh, shit," I said, like I'd just discovered some sort of secret. Grinning, I prodded at that spot on his side, more gently this time.

He was stronger than me, and could probably throw me off of him if he wanted, but I was counting on him not.

"No!" Edgar yelped, caught around a wheeze of laughter as he pretended distress. "Don't you dare!"

Batting his hands out, Edgar tried to search out Neil's torso and find a place to tease him too.

"Dare what?" I asked, tightening my knees around his middle and hanging on as he squirmed underneath me.

"Ah," I shouted, twisting away from him, when he prodded at a sensitive place below my ribs. We wrestled like that for a few moments, and breathless, I ducked down to seal my mouth over his.

"That," Edgar said. He was halfway to a retaliatory nudge at that spot again when Neil kissed him and Edgar could only sigh. Most days, he still had no fucking clue what he meant to Neil but in this moment, he felt cared for and it was a contenting thought.

Snickering against his lips, I let the kiss linger, one hand framing his jaw and my lips parting against his.

I sat back, finally, with one last playful nip to his bottom lip.

"What happened to my coffee?" I grinned.

"I was having an existential crises. I was busy," Edgar said. With Neil here, it was easier to feel solid, like the city couldn't steal him against his will.

Pretending reluctance, Edgar disentangled himself from the couch and headed over to the kitchen. "Come on then."

"Save your fucking existential crises for when I'm not here," I said, even though it was pretty obvious, from the last few minutes, that I didn't mind.

I crowded up behind him, my arms settling around his waist, and followed him into the kitchen.

"Those things cost a fucking fortune," I said, pointing to the box of little coffee pods he had. "You got any of the special flavors?"

"You interrupted one in progress," Edgar reminded him. He shrugged at the other question, gesturing expansively to a few open boxes that he'd clearly been tasting his way through.

"It's not like I spend money on anything but food and condoms. Or am I supposed to be buying you presents?"

"You should be glad I interrupted it," I muttered, my mouth against his temple, his hair tickling my nose. I herded him against the counter and picked one of the cups from those open boxes. Hazelnut.

"Here, you do it," I said, pressing it into his palm. I chuckled. "You want to buy me shit, I'm not going to stop you. As long as it's not fucking flowers."

Edgar rolled his eyes but it was mostly fond. He closed his hand around the cup and lifted the top of the machine to slot it in. Neil joked but truthfully, Edgar really was still enjoying the novelty of it.

"You know, this is how the future was supposed to be. Put a little package in and suddenly you've got coffee. None of the fucked up shite," he said, watching the coffee flow down.

"Oh yeah?" I laughed, my hand splayed out on the center of his chest, and for once, I let myself enjoy the way he felt wrapped up in my arms, when sex wasn't much of a factor.

"What do you know about the future?"

"I'm from it, asshole," Edgar reminded him, giving Neil a light elbow to his stomach. Truthfully, he had no interest in making him leave, but most of their communication seemed to have based itself in ribbing, taking care never to love too much.

"You're from a metal tube, in the future. That doesn't make your knowledge real comprehensive," I pointed out, jabbing him in the ribs with my thumb, not too far from that ticklish spot I just found.

"Oi!" Edgar wheezed a little, only half-successful in suppressing his laughter. "Fucking rude, you are."

When the cup poured out, Edgar made a gesture like he might just dump the whole thing before passing it back to Neil.

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